Friday, August 14, 2009

In Defense of Fake-Baking (or real baking since I have been known to do both)...

Recently, a person whom I respect deeply (and they hopefully know this) commented on the practice of utilizing tanning beds. The comment was that it was an act of vanity too deep for them to understand – or something along those lines. I’m paraphrasing – so as to not convict the innocent and because frankly, I’ve slept since then – but the gist is there. To follow the statement, this person, whom I deeply respect, went on to say that if that same person would spend as much time in the Word as they do tanning, they would be better inside for it. I will concede that my life would be enriched by reading and praying for those 30 minutes a day, 3 or 4 times per week, 6-8 weeks out of the year, that I typically spend tanning. I will also allow that that enriching time would likely improve me inside and better my heart as well.

But in my defense (not that I really felt attacked – just generally – haha, oh who am I kidding - I really just needed a blog topic), all the things I (and bagillions of other people) do to better my outsides including tanning, wearing make-up, cutting/highlighting my hair, shaving, etc. could also be argued equally as time wasted. They are things that come with living in this society - a society who celebrates and values skinny, tan, and smooth-skin more than it does a good heart or disposition (not that I am claiming to have either of those).

So do I tan because I’m vain? Maybe a little bit, but not completely. Do I get more compliments when my skin is a little darker? Yes. Do those compliments (and any others) boost my self-confidence? Of course they do. Do I need that? Sadly, some days I do. I wear make-up, shave, and even exercise for some of the same reasons. I know throwing exercise in there may trip some up. We should exercise to be healthier and maintain our temples better. I know that. But if I’m going to be perfectly honest, all my dieting and exercise efforts the last two years to lose the weight I’ve lost (and work to continue to lose) were not even mostly about being healthier. They were about looking better. Why else do people exercise, cut and/or style their hair, wear certain clothes, etc?

I’ve spent the better part of my 30 years, 5 months and 6 days (but who’s counting?) overweight, pale, and alone. I’m sick of it. Plain and simple. So to change my alone status, I’ve committed to do things that hopefully shape up and improve my outside. Those are the things I have control over. The fact of the matter is that guys are not immediately attracted to a good heart. They don’t cross the room to talk to a good heart. They don’t ask out a good heart without regard for the heart’s vessel. So I perform these acts of vanity to increase my marketability. The market for 30+ and single is really tight – especially in this area. Most people live here because it is a good place to raise a family. Being that I also do not frequent the area adult watering holes, the number of fish in my pond is drastically reduced (although the bar scene would also likely be full of 20-somethings looking for younger and hotter too). The dating pool is shallow – in all senses of the word.

Wrong as it may be, first impressions are aesthetic, and the facade of me is a work in progress. Additionally, a good heart is not always enough either. (And yes I realize that I keep saying that assuming one would appraise my heart as good.) Sure you can ask how that’s working for me, and I’d have to answer, not at all, but it wasn’t working for me before either. At least this way, no one can say I don’t make any effort.

Gotta run – my tan is fading from the indoor lighting…haha!

3 comments:

katy said...

Just my opinion, but I think folks can really go overboard sometimes. Everyone has habits/hobbies that can get out of hand and detract from their spiritual life. But I don't think it's the same from one person to the next. Perhaps one person spends too much time texting and not enough praying. Another spends too much time and effort on plastic surgery and not enough in Bible Study. Someone else may focus too much effort on his job and not enough evangelizing. All fall short!!!!! But I think it's up to God to convict each of us as to the individual habits and practices that are becoming idols in our lives.

If your friend feels God calling her to stop tanning, then so be it. I hope she would realize that doesn't mean He's necessarily asking the same of anyone else!

Summer Says... said...

I'm with you - there are lots of things impeding our walks. To pick on one is not really fair (especially one I participate in here and there!). It was said as an aside to a bigger point, to a large group of people, so it wasn't a conversation where I could really respond.

I like your opinions. Thanks for sharing!

Alissa said...

Hey....go for it! I know this isn't quite the same, but I went quite a few years without highlighting my hair at all. And then I'd do it just once every year or something like that....it's expensive and I didn't think I owed it to myself to indulge in something like that. But....now I always feel much better about the way I look when my hair is highlighted, so I've decided that I will treat myself and do it every few months (even if my hair isn't the color it's supposed to be!). If it gives you confidence, do it!