This past Sunday, my class discussed being respectful (our whole unit is on relationships - in the broad sense of human interaction, not the mroe narrow significant other sense - thank goodness, otherwise I would have had to skip more than just the marriage Sunday, but I digress - don't I always digress?). We read from Epehesians 6:1-9 which talks about respect from child to parent, parent to child, slave to master and master to slave.
The slave/master section was equated to modern day employer/employee relations. In that, the question was posed, "how important is work to you?" Several answered along the lines that it was a means to pay the bills and take care of the necessities of life, but not something that identified them. I answered that it was probably more important to me than it was to most because I feel like it identifies me. Of course I don't think people see me and immediately think - there goes an HR chick - but it's a label that's mine. So I value it. For someone who doesn't have a spouse and kids, work is important to me. I'm not sure my point translated well - because several have checked in with me this week to make sure I was okay. And while it makes me very sad not to have those things (especially this time of year - can we outlaw the Kajazahelz commercials already? They are nothing but trouble - depressing singles and getting husbands/S.O.s in trouble who don't shop there!), life is what it is. And at present and the way-to-forseeable future, my labels don't include wife and mom.
Does it mean my values are off to say that my job is important to me? I don't think so. Do I realize I'm more than my job? Sure. I get that I'm a daughter, sibling, aunt, friend, etc...but I'm those things to multiple people and those people have multiples of those things. My parents have three kids, my brother/sister have two siblings, my niece/nephews have three aunts and my friends have other friends. But my job, isn't shared with anyone else, so that's a title that belongs to me. Does any of that make sense?
The discussion then went to being content. One person said there are probably 2-3 months in the year in which he is completely content with all aspects of his life - wife, kids, job, etc. Which has led me to wonder - how do you define content? I know what the dictionary says and I know the Bible tells us to be content with what we have (1 Timothy 6:8). So how do you do that? How do you not think "this can't be all there is to life?" And is it wrong to want more?
SBC Meeting #2 - June 14 2023
10 months ago
2 comments:
Thought provoking post!!
Regarding the first part: I think the wrong question is being asked. If work is ALL that is important to you, and that is ALL you identify with, then yes, your values are off. I bet that many of those people thought work was very important before they were married and/or had kids. But their focus has shifted.
For whatever reason, you are still able to focus on your work. If you are doing a good job, take pride in the work you have done. Show it off the same way others "show off" their spouse or children. It is valuable!
Regarding the second part: I doubt that there are very many people who are truly content with their lives - if they work they want to stay home, if they stay home, they want to work (or be able to get out of the house. They want to eat steak, but the budget only allows for hamburger helper. But that doesn't mean they can't be happy. Focus on the good things you have instead of continuously comparing yourself to your neighbor. You may find yourself becoming more content as time goes by. I'm a pretty content person, but there are times that I am dissatisfied. And that is only human - to want to better yourself and your surroundings. I feel it's ok to want more, but again, don't lose yourself to that desire because it can never be satisfied.
Great post, and great comment from Danielle.
I agree there are few people in this world who are truly content. It's just part of the human struggle to want more than we've been given. I don't think any of us should feel guilty for wanting more, necessarily, as long as there's always a deep-rooted thankfulness for what you've already got... and an attitude that everything will still be just fine even if "more" never comes.
As for finding your identity in your work... I'm surprised that your classmates didn't understand your point. Do none of them work outside the home? It's virtually impossible for what you do to not (at least partially) define who you are. Of course it can be problematic when someone begins to value their job more than anything else... putting in extra time and effort at the office that should be saved for home, or for their own rest and refreshment. But I think it's equally unhealthy for someone to derive their entire identity from their husband and/or children. Basically, no ONE earthly thing should define any of us.
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